Double Shot... is driving me crazy.
Today is the last day of summer school. Yessssss! He did very well. I think even if he bombs the chemistry final this morning, and he won't, he will still get an A. Those grades will replace the grades he got second semester and it will help bring his gpa back up. We think he's learned his lesson about doing his homework.
Do you ever wonder what Jim Carey was like as a teen? I do. I wonder if he was like Double Shot. That kid never stops. He has schtick after schtick complete with physical humor. He wears me out. We tell him to stop... over, and over... and over. The problem is we end up laughing even when we are mad.
Ugh. He goes through phases where he says his favorite thing at that moment to the point where we are about to lose our minds. Last summer he saw Master of Disguise starring Dana Carvey. He is still quoting it. He started out with saying, "Turtle," all the time. He can mimic just about anything. After weeks and weeks of me telling him to stop I freaked out so he agreed to stop saying it... and switched to saying, "Hamster," the same way. I've often thought if I ever saw Dana Carvey walking across the street I might run him over for making that movie. Double Shot is still saying, "I just loooooove moisture!" on a regular basis. Aaaahhhhhhh!
Double Shot also loved the movie Forrest Gump. Nearly every day he says to Booper, "Bennn-Nay you're my best good dog!" He just pops out lines from that movie at the oddest times...
"And after five years I got a college daa-grey..."
"And then I started run-nang..."
And on... and on... and on.
We won't even get into Napoleon Dynamite! I knew all the lines before I even saw the movie because of him!
Oy! There is so much more. It is never ending. You know, he can even throw himself around to where it looks like someone invisible is beating him up!
And... he isn't even quiet or still in his sleep! He is a sleep walker and eater. We've caught him when he's roaming and he looks like he's awake but he isn't. Most of the time we just find the evidence that he'd been up in the form of lights left on and food laying out. It is hilarious when we can understand what he's saying. It is usually sports related and he is making some sort of awesome play. In the trailer this past weekend I heard him hollering about not being able to find Benny. Back when he was ten, the night after he went Salmon fishing, I found him hollering on the floor while frantically working an invisible reel.
Now Double Shot is making me hate You Tube. He finds all kinds of stuff on there. The latest is some guy going around acting like he's mentally impaired saying, "I try!" to random people that don't know he's not and showing their reactions and how they try to politely get him to go away. He will not stop doing it and... I'll be honest here. Sometimes I want to punch him in the face.
I. am. being. tortured. by. my. seventeen. year. old. son.
Send help. Please.