Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Just in Case you are Wondering...

Mr. Macchiato and I made the decision awhile back not to have any identifiable pictures of him or our children on this blog. Just as a pre-caution and because our kids have had blogs and do the facebook thing and I couldn't very well impose restrictions on them that I wasn't on myself... such as never posting a picture of someone without their permission. Because it is my blog we figured it would be okay to post a picture of myself. As a pre-caution I did not include that picture in my profile so that it was visible when I commented on other blogs. Anyone who read the previous blog knows that I did post identifiable pictures of all of us. Initially, with this blog, I did include a picture of myself in the profile and that is how some of y'all found your way to this blog when you recognized me. I like to visualize the person who writes the blog I'm reading as I read it and figured others probably feel the same. I love, love, LOVE to look at other people's pictures on their blogs! There are so many times when I really want to post pictures but...

Yesterday I decided to remove the pictures of myself. The reason is simply because of what all I've shared on here and the fact that I do not share my blog with many people that live in my area. I started to get concerned that people I don't know very well would stumble upon the blog and recognize me by the picture. I see blog relationships and real life relationships a bit differently and the thought of people knowing so much about me while I know nothing about them a bit frightening. In real life there is the process of getting to know the other person and taking time to share things as there is a trust built between you. Do you know what I mean?

The problems created by the SD have made it incredibly difficult for me to form relationships... and to even maintain them. No longer can I go hang out with a friend at a coffee shop or go out to eat or even hang out with a group of people. I simply cannot be heard. That would be okay if I could just still be a part of things and listen... but the truth is, in a group situation when you cannot participate in the talking those around you try at first to make sure you are included but eventually it is like you aren't even there. People even stop looking in your direction. Getting to know anyone new at church is impossible. It is just too loud and whispering in someones ear is just too intimate to start off that way. Talking on the phone is a nightmare. When I don't blog or e-mail the silence is deafening. The fact is I am social. I need interaction between myself and other people. Blogging satisfies that need.

Anyway, so that is where I am at with that and why I took the pictures down. I feel more comfortable... if someone who knows me stumbles upon this blog they would be able to figure out it is me. If someone who is an acquaintance stumbles upon this blog it would take awhile to figure out and then only if they read all of it. By not having my picture there... there can't be instant recognition.

I will be getting a new blog header and profile picture from the fabulous Rick Green. I've been on the list for quite some time now and I know my turn is nearing!

11 comments:

Chris H said...

I will miss seeing your gorgeous smiley face chick.

RANGER said...

I agree with removing the pix that you took down. TMI, yes.

I admit that I had not thought it through that the dystonia would affect your making new friends. Just consider though, this is certainly communication without whispering.

Can you think of it as flying fingers finding friendly fellowship?

Trisha said...

Coffee Bean-

I really understand a lot of what you are talking about. Hubby and I talk about how much I share on my blog and about pictures, etc. It is a slippery slope. I will miss seeing your face! I always looked at it and saw my friend.

SD really is a big suckaroonie! If it were a physical being I think I would really go to town on it by beating the daylights out of it. However, it is something I can't kick, or hit, or bite, or scratch. It just does battle with my soul daily and I have to battle back the best I can.

I too have found myself socially limited due to SD. Thank God for my microphone which, even though I got a lot of "You look like Britney!" comments helped me be heard. I had a lot ofstares but I didn't care as long as I could communicate.

I am praying fo ryou and your family and think of you every day as you continue your journey with life, SD, and family.

Stay strong.

noble pig said...

Totally understandable and totally your choice! I respect that.

Two Dogs said...

Prolly a good thing if'n you're about to start talking politics.

I get creepy mail, but then again, I am a man, with no kids around.

jojo said...

It seems that the things that seperate us from others brings us to a place where we find compassion and support from people we don't even know. I understand the removing of the picture...i'm glad I saw it before you did that ;) You ae a beutiful person inside and out. Take care.

Mabunny said...

Gratz on your decision!
I have wondered if I should be posting pic of us on the puter but alway come back to it being ok, at least for the time being. I always run it by hubby though and he says it should be fine.
Have a great day !

MUD said...

With the MUDster, what you see is what you get. I don't understand, but I do agree with your feelings. I will continue to read and I do want you to know that even without SD,d time hearing everything you say because of my old Artillery damaged ears. MUD

Trisha said...

Hey there Coffee Bean! I have officially tagged you to do the "three random things" meme. have fun!

"Phtphtbt!"

Brenda said...

Rick will do an awesome job. I can't wait to see it. I understand your reasoning. We do have to remember that while we have made some friends on our blogs there are also strangers reading it. It is good to be careful.

Sheri said...

Completely understand about taking down your pic. I figure it's just me, and I have a big black mean looking dog. I've always asked permission before posting pics of other people, and try to avoid using names and a lot of identifiable things. Of course, I already have one stalker, so what's a few more? :-)