Monday, May 19, 2008

I Might Have...

I might have once hit a parked car while riding my bike and hit the bar so hard that I was forever grateful I was a girl and not a boy.

I might have once walked into pole while walking past a boy I had a crush on in high school.

I might have had a girl I didn't even know shove my face into a locker and try to shut it.

I might have been almost severely burned by all of the toppings sliding off of my pizza and slapping onto my neck while making eyes at a boy across a pizza parlor after a Friday night football game.

I might have worn a backless jumper and heels to go four wheeling in the dark behind a college.

I might have slid 100 ft. or more down a water logged embankment when I tried to discreetly go potty behind some bushes.

I might have screamed very loudly and that might have sent some boys from my high school running to come help me...

I might have been basically naked at that point. And muddy.

I might have had snot run from my nose like a faucet all over my then boyfriend, now husband's face, while we were making out... causing him to call me "Sneezy" to this day.

I might have been stopped by the same policeman on my way home from my then fiance', now husband's college, four weekends in a row.

I might have gotten a ticket the last time he stopped me.

I might have once dumped out my purse while trapped in the Wendy's Drive Thru and puked in it.

I might have once made my husband Mac & Cheese with breast milk, watch him eat it, and then laugh for 19 years about it.

I might have once gotten a ticket for driving 94 miles an hour while changing CDs on my way home from a Women's Church Retreat in Florida.

I might have watched a surgery where three masses were removed from my left Ta Ta.

I might have asked questions the entire time.

I might have once had so many dirty dishes that I put them all into the bathtub to soak.

I might have to stop blogging, reading blogs and staring while I think about blogs before my family hides my computer. That or hire a maid.

So, what might you have done???

21 comments:

AmusedMomma said...

I might know which ones of these you've told me are true!

This might be a dangerous game.

Or this might be fun.

:-) Thanks for the Monday morning smile.

Pioneering in PA said...

Lol, thanks for the laughs. I might have done a few of those same things myself. And.. some things I might have done, were loads and loads worse.

They may have been. :)

Trisha said...

I might have laughed out loud reading your post!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

I MIGHT be regretting that I came over to read your blog today.

Then again, I MIGHT NOT!

Hallie :)

Brenda said...

You are Brave sharing that stuff. I might not be as brave as you! : )

Elysa said...

I might have started a fire in my desk in highschool and confessed to it only to have the teacher tell me to be quiet.

Julia said...

Lordy! Part of me says I want all of these to be true so I can laugh my head off. Part of me hopes that your life isn't THAT crazy! LOL . . . I love it! I'll have to think on this and see if I have anything to share.

RANGER said...

I might have once had so much trouble with Blogger that I finally left a comment on your blog as *anonymous* because that was the only identity Blogger would consider recognizing at that time.

I might be a constant lurker on your blog, for that reason.

I might have to get over it ...

Anonymous said...

I MIGHT have once shoved a bunch of dirty dishes into the oven when a snooty relative was walking up my front stairs, only to have my husband turn on the oven a half hour later, producing toxic smoke from burning Tupperware.

Very important lessons sometimes hurt. And sometimes they take weeks to scrape off the bottom of the oven and wash out of the drapes. And live down at the family reunion.

Now I have a dishwasher.

Greg C said...

Doing a little blog hopping today. This post was a scream. I can't believe all this might have happened to you. I loved the part about puking in your purse. I might have once puked in my girlfriend's mother's purse while on a school bus trip. I wonder if she still has it.

Bogart in P Towne said...

I am so disturbed about the breast milk thing that I "might" go take a tums to settle my upset stomach.

Coffee Bean said...

All y'all's comments are cracking me up! Thanks!!! And... just so you know... all of that is true. You can thank me for sparing you from some of the ones I held back.

Chris H said...

I MIGHT have lost me mind and can't remember a darn thing I MIGHT have done in me ill gotten youth! Very funny post Kelly!

Mabunny said...

Loved the post K.J! especially about puking in your purse. Did you get fries with that?

I MIGHT have been line dancing and had someone pull my shirt from behind, therefore flashing everyone watching...

I MIGHT have lied to my dad while out with friends, only to show back up at my car 30 minutes later to find my dad sitting on it with
a cop...

I MIGHT have gotten grounded for that...

I MIGHT have peed on an army base while we were out in a field wathcing paratroopers jump, because there was no place else to go, ( but I MIGHT have klled some ants when I did it!)...

Flea said...

I might be far less interesting than you are. :) But I would have been asking questions and watching the surgery too. Maybe we ARE sisters!

Roland Hulme said...

"I might have once made my husband Mac & Cheese with breast milk, watch him eat it, and then laugh for 19 years about it."

Oh my GOODNESS!

I'm going to have to keep a VERY close eye on my wife if she ever takes up cooking!

April said...

Oh my mac and cheese! That was hilarious! I can't believe you did that, but I am sure it boosted his immune system. Ha!! I am so going to do an "I Might Have" post. Giving you all of the credit of course.

I will never eat mac and cheese again without thinking of that. So funny!

Karen Deborah said...

OMG where have I been? This was hilarious, but I'll never tell. nope nope nope. But why please tell me why did you puke in your purse? Were you drinking beer?
I might have cut class and gone to the park and had Boones Farm Apple Wine. Now that will make you puke. Least it wasn't Ripple.

Coffee Bean said...

I puked in my purse because I was pregnant and nauseous. I thought I'd feel better if I got something to eat but after I ordered I was trapped in line and... you do what ya gotta do. I sacrificed my purse so that the other people in line didn't see me puking out the car door. I'm nice like that.

Lynne's Somewhat Invented Life said...

Thihs was very fun to read. I want the rest of the story about the naked slide down the embankment...when the boys arrived.

Doris said...

OMG...How funny you r ! I might have wrecked my best friend's boyfriend's Daddy's new pickup truck.I was driving it on a dark back bountry road while he and she were smooching like crazy. I had no license either.